I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
