Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
