So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
