he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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