direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
