I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
