The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize