whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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