Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
