my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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