White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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