You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
