she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
