i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
