Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
