it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
