At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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