but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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