Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
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