Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
