i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
