She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
