that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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