Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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