Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
