We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
No subtext here. People are naked.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
