He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
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