oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
