I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
