She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
So gin and wine won't be happening again
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
