i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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