he wants to bone in the snuggie
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
