Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Sober January is a disaster.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
