You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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