garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
