it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
