You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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