you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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