I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Randomize