It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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