Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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