you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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