you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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