It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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