I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
