i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
