would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
