he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Say something about gay babies.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
