I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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