I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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