stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
