....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
